Marriage: Institutionalized Institutionalism
Part of my continuing crusade as a writer and an activist is simply to insure that everyone has choices - even if that choice is to not choose at all. I'm looking for inclusion, validation and justice; what I have little tolerance for are situations in which our choices are limited to the one the powers at be want you to choose or the really crummy alternative.
In particular, one area in which our government practically forces our hand is marriage. While marriage is a valid choice, it is not the choice for me. Or my partner/bff/bf/SO/better half, etc. While heterosexual and seemingly a man and woman, we do not want to get married. We are atheists without a need for a religious ceremony; I cannot imagine him asking my father for my hand. An engagement ring is still a symbol of ownership, a way of marking the woman in the relationship as "taken." Women are still bought and sold all over the world and participating in a ceremony that stems from those sales makes me (and my partner) uncomfortable.
Regardless of our reasons, we're not interested, politically or personally, and now we're trying to figure out where that leaves us. He was just offered a permanent position with an international company; he asked about domestic partner benefits and was told he'd have to talk directly with the benefits administrator. So let's say that he can add me to his insurance (highly doubtful). Well, we'd have to add the tax-free income back onto his taxes because the federal government wouldn't recognize our domestic partnership and therefore he'd have to pay. You have to be married in order for the plan to work the way it should.
We will also have to seek out a lawyer because if I were to get seriously injured or sick, my PARENTS would be the only people legally able to make any decisions about my medical care if I were unable to decide for myself.
Again, the government needs to back off and stay out of marriage. With no end to legislating morality in sight, people who choose not to get married continue to be left with one federally-mandated choice and trying to work out an alternative. And if those are the only choices, then everyone should be given the opportunity to choose marriage.
I'd love to hear your thoughts!
- MadLibPoet
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